Thursday, April 20, 2017

The Gaffe of Gaffes..Or Is It? - Part 1

Mistakes - People simply look down upon you as if you are a pig when you make one! But, when they commit an unforgivable howler, they utter punch dialogues like "Mistakes are the secrets of success" or "Mistakes are a part of life" etc. So, what is exactly happening here?


From aeons when the first human beings framed and formed a society and learnt how to communicate through language, we have always been at the mercy of others for social validation despite our unique talents and expertises. Then, there are those mavericks for whom society is like a bowling alley wherein they get a strike by dismantling all the pins in one-go.! Let us focus on common people like us here.

Success or failure depends on the mistakes and errors that we consciously or unconsciously effectuate in our daily lives. The perceived notion is that the success rate of an individual is indirectly proportional to the number of goof ups that they have done in their lives. Most of us have subconsciously equated success with money and money with hard work when we forget a basic fact that even a smuggler or any person indulging in unethical, immoral, unlawful and illegitimate acts also has oodles of green cash at their disposal.


So, success is a very subjective term as it will definitely vary from person to person because it is a summum bonum of each and every person's needs, activities, attitudes, interests, wants, opinions, desires, beliefs, faiths, cultures, habits, behaviors, lifestyles and personalities. However, the underlying self-image to be right, despite the evidence contrary, in front of your parents, friends, relatives, peers and strangers has been playing a pivotal role since time immemorial so that others view us in good light even if there is no electricity!



Without you uttering any profanities or expletives for the above pathetic PJ, we will proceed further. So, why do we have the incessant urge to get the attention of other people and make them see that we are correct? It gives us a sense of false satisfaction that we are right in this world because of our beliefs and values that makes us who we are. Also, when we give others the impression that we are right, they tend to have a sense of confidence in us and accept us into their fold. We have always wanted to be associated with a part of a group as many of us crave for love from others and also to have the feeling of belonging with the 'normal' society so that we are not alienated and pushed into the despairs of depression and chasms of unhappiness. 

Instead of being genuine, authentic, sincere and original, this concept of self-projection is the most destructive weapon to have been invented by Mankind, and Womankind!,as even in the face of evidence that when a person is actually and factually wrong, they deny it vehemently to protect their own self-image from harm and wound by accusing and blaming anything and everything in sight without having the conviction to acknowledge as to what they did was improper and incorrect. Such small-minded people are so self-obsessed with their excessive selfishness that they cannot clearly see they have caused hurt and injury - be it physical, mental, emotional, psychological, spiritual or financial - all around them because they have strongly and deeply clung to their wrong opinions and judgements as if they were sacred gospels and canons.



Such people don't have any sense of guilt or regret that their stupid actions have caused tremendous and unnecessary troubles to other people. All they care about is to safeguard their dumb self-image and be luxuriantly happy with their inflated egos that everything is fine and dandy when it is not in reality. As how I see it, however flawed a person is, it is better to be real than hide behind the steel walls of facades.We can strive for perfection by grit, determination, patience, endurance, persistence, perseverance and iron will to be the best at what we excel in. Whether that is achieved or not is entirely different story but the pursuit for perfection and excellence can be executed than displaying false smiles and fake laughs.


The reason is that the consequences are disastrous when someone deliberately or unintentionally punctures their helium-filled delusional self image which they had meticulously created to be seen as apparently right. When such a thing happens, the ruptured self-deflated individual goes to great lengths to take their revenge on the person who had dared or attacked their self-image in an unplanned manner. I don't have to spell out as to what will happen when there is a tit-for-tat. The extreme hatred and intense hostility might even span generations.  

There are those who will now say "Dude..We know these things already" without actually knowing these things. This is yet another kind of self-image to project that you are a sciolist. Another ostensibly elite category will try to live beyond their means like champagne on a beer budget.



Why am I giving an elaborate gyan about the effects of self-image and its morbid ramifications?

Part 2 has all the answers to it.

                                                      
                                                     X---To Be Continued---X 

No comments: